Monday, April 4, 2011

My Friends and My Guitar

I got it online the last day of the month, but I kept my goal! Three months down and six songs recorded. Every third song I record is an original and this one is one of my favorites.

I wrote "My Friends and My Guitar" almost exactly two years ago. It was the product of a large build-up of drama that lead to a big "WTH?" moment. I think there is a point in the first year home of every returned missionary where they just look around and say, "Well, that didn't pan out...", like Mr. Cogburn in 'True Grit'.

I came home from the Dominican Republic bright-eyed and enthusiastic for a world that I assumed would be smooth-sailing compared to the rigors of my mission. After all, I had been obedient, I had sharply refined my social skills, school, friends, and happy dating had to be on my horizon.

Well, things happened. Don't worry though, this story has a happy ending.

First: my two best friends began dating. It was made more complicated by the fact that one was my roommate and the other was my ex-girlfriend. They are now married and are perfect for each other; we are all good friends now and hang out again, but in these first few months, none of us knew how to handle it. It was...awkward. Even by the time I wrote this song, things had become much more comfortable. However, as becomes married couples, I knew that things were forever going to change and the nature of our friendship would be part of it.

Second: I failed at dating. From my first few weeks in my new apartment, a flirtatious relationship had begun between myself and another girl in our ward. She had even taken me to meet her family. Though we had little to nothing in common, with maybe the exception of both enjoying The Format, we made a go at it. Never going on a one-on-one date and in spite of the girl's fluctuating feelings for me, we kissed. Then she pretty much disappeared, though she kept stringing me along. One night, all of the roommates banded together and told me to go over and demand to know what was going on in the most manly way possible. I marched over, called her outside into the night, grabbed her, kissed her, and demanded "What is going on?!"

My manliness seemed effective: she owned up to her instability and apologized. Surprisingly, she even sought a goodnight kiss. I marched back with a certain spring in my step, having conquered all. Well, until the next day. Her roommate asked my roommate if I had been crying before I had come over. That goodnight kiss? She thought that she had been breaking my heart to the point of crying; it was a pity kiss.

Goodbye manliness. Here, take my Y chromosome with you.

Not many days after, my other best friend, who also happened to be a girl, told me that if I did not date her we could no longer hang out. I found myself in a position where I couldn't date anyone else, though I knew things were ending with this other girl. As I could not give a definite answer, I said goodbye to one of my friends of four years.

As for the first girl, we ended up going on a final, "break-up date", the only one-on-one date we would ever have. There we decided that we might try casual dating in the future, since we never really got to know each other. So, on her birthday, I gave her a homemade coupon for a free dinner with yours truly.

Not surprisingly, weeks passed with no reply. As she was soon leaving town for a few months, I sent a series of texts prodding a response. Well, I got one: she snapped, saying she would get back to me when she got back to me and if it was really a present for her, shouldn't she be allowed to redeem it when she chose to?

It was right then that I asked, "WTF?" (Translated: why the face?)

I went home and wrote the song in pretty much one sitting and the lyrics reflect all of this. The first verse sings of how confident I was in myself on my mission, the second sings of school stress and how I felt all of my closest friends were moving on, the bridge is a warning for my friends still coming home to keep their friends close, and the final verse was directed at the girl I had been trying to date. However, the song's tone is optimistic: the melody is both happy and slightly melancholy and the last line is "I'll sing along with my friends and my guitar." I by no means believed that things would keep going downhill.

Two months later, I went to London and met Abby. And we lived happily ever after.

This song is one of my most personal and it is one of my favorite guitar parts. When recording, I did the guitar in one take; I wanted to give it the feel it had when I first wrote the song, almost all at once. I had always thought this would be a good song for a banjo. Well, now I had a banjo! It took me dozens of takes to get the part I had in mind. When I began to get frustrated, I asked myself, "What? You can't record a part while you are still writing it on an instrument you just started learning?" Nevertheless, I got the parts down and I am proud of it. If you want a banjo in a song, learn to play the banjo. That has some depth to it, right?

This song for me is now an interesting journal entry and its optimism is well placed. I hope you enjoy it!

My Friends and My Guitar